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Family accounts can add a depth to your understanding of your prisoner’s naturally occurring mannerisms and quirks. It could be as simple as faking fashion sense and style.

I’ve been in prison for years with some people, then one day I see a photo of them in the free world, or overhear them with their family in the visiting room – and I’d have sworn this was a wholly different person. When all must wear the same prison issued clothes, it’s easy to fake.

If family relations are stable, when it’s time, ask for introductions.

This prison environment is so sterilized and neutral, it doesn’t lend itself to showing off personality. What are the subtle and glaring misrepresentations? Women have their hair extensions and whatever other enhanced aspects to them and men do as well.

During talks, are they more inhibited than you’d like? Do they talk about things you’ve never heard of or never thought to try before? Every bit of information is a clue to better knowing your potential partner. (I’ll probably be hated for naming this one, but it’s important.) Perhaps those names are your competition. Some families lacked closeness prior to the person coming to prison.

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You’ve decided to widen your options to include those who are currently incarcerated. Do you want a situation that more easily justifies your desire to go slowly?

It made me look at criminals and offenders in a whole new light.

She leaves you laughing one second and crying the next" Missy"To assert in any case that a man must be absolutely cut off from society because he is absolutely evil amounts to saying that society is absolutely good, and no-one in his right mind will believe this today." Albert Camus (1913-60)The directory has three sections: county jail, with contact information for the jail facility; inmate search, to locate an offender in custody; and state prison, housing for long term, sentenced prisoners.

This is about knowing yourself and your motives honestly.

You’ll need these truths as an extra foundation to buffer the challenge that initially awaits a prison relationship.

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