Taking dating to the next level
My attention was too divided to make any substantive progress; I couldn’t focus on any one thing because I was trying to focus on oing to bars and hitting on women made it difficult to figure out where I was going wrong. Or maybe she didn’t like me and I didn’t pick up on it.
From there, you want to figure out not only which aspects are the ones you need to work on the most.
It’s part of the binary-view of social skills that guys tend to get brought up in; you’re good with women or you aren’t. You can point to the world at being unfair or complain that other people demonize your natural-if-awkwardly-expressed desires. As it turned out, the way I was practicing slowed me down.
It absolves you, in many ways, of having to do any self-examination. Without meaning to, I had actually made things more difficult.
You might have a decent lifestyle but need to put more work into connecting with people, whereas someone else might have to deal with internal issues while otherwise being fairly charismatic.
Still others will want to work on their external presentation. Improving any skill takes practice and practice takes time.