Too accommodating girlfriend bored
You’ve seen worse girls nab coveted guys, but you can’t even lock down a steady hookup. I had to pause and really consider this for a while.My friend has everything going for her and she’s always been the nicest one of the group.
Having a girl start feeling too secure with you is a BIG problem in any kind of relationship. Because there's something else happening in those movies too - another reason why girls swoon for Prince Charming, and it isn't his trust fund. and everybody ends up with his own bored girl as a result.
So, rather than conclude that “girls like jerks” and then acting accordingly, take her on a killer date. That’s the “secret” to not landing in the friend zone every time. Well, it varies from person to person, obviously, but it’s not dinner and a movie; it’s something more exciting. It might be a historical bar crawl of places where famous people used to drink in your neighborhood. When you’re done with that…The other thing that “nice guys” do is to constantly seek approval from their dates.
It’s doing something together that would be fun on your own, but is more fun with another person. It’s something that 15 other guys haven’t already done with her. Never ask her if she’s having a good time and only tell her that you’re having a good time once, twice tops, on any given date. Seeking approval isn’t just a weak behavior, it’s also stressful for the other person. The two of you are out on a first date — something that’s pretty much always stressful. Give her room to breathe and if the connection is there, it will happen.
When you continually ask her if she’s having a good time or assure her that you are, you are basically demanding her to agree with you. If it’s not, you constantly seeking her approval won’t do the trick. Nothing says “needy” more than a dude who constantly has to know what his girl is doing.
Do you think this adds or subtracts from the overall stress of the situation? The whole point of this date is for the two of you to get to know each other, not to start planning your wedding. When the date is over, don’t feel like you have to text her 16 times a day just to check in. It has nothing to do with being a “nice guy” and everything to do with being the type of guy who gives her room to live. That just says, “I had some bad dating experiences and learned all the wrong lessons.”It won’t work. Jordan Harbinger is a Wall Street lawyer turned Social Dynamics expert and coach.